This time last year I was still a student! I had no idea what the future had in store but I was determined that 2012 would be a good year for me. I was ready to work hard and make whatever sacrifices were necessary to improve myself and the world around me. I started with my new years resolutions:
1) Be in less of a state when writing goals for 2013
2) Stronger, Fitter, Heavier
3) Get one piece of writing published
4) Make any one other person smile everyday
5) 2:1 or better
6) Find joy in the things I do and spread joy amongst others
7) Never give up on something I believe in
The first thing that strikes me is how many of these things I failed at! Particularly 3 and 5 - I graduated with a 2:2 in sport and exercise science from Sheffield Hallam and, though I don't think it will make a difference in the long run (my CV still says "2nd class honours" and nobody ever asks), it was dissapointing to miss my goal. I am still proud to have graduated at the first attempt after facing some of the darkest days and nights of my life. The published writing thing is a goal I forgot that I had...!
I think I can conclusively say that I've achieved the first goal but by luck more than judgement - last night was my first alcohol free night for something like 10 days. I love it when my social life gets hectic but I start to resent myself after prolonged periods of abusing my liver!
The rest of my goals fall somewhere between failure and success. I am certainly heavier and close to my peak weight but I don't feel very strong or very fit at the moment. This is partly to do with the fact that I am out of training due to the fact that I have been focussing much of my effort on my professional life, but also simply because my training cycle tends to peak during the summer months. I expect to be the strongest, heaviest ane fittest I have ever been come May/June 2013 and this is very much due to the foundations which I laid down earlier this year by training hard during the tennis season. I feel that this is a success.
The rest of my goals are hard to measure and, I guess, represent my underlying values. The smile goal was particularly interesting and was one of the best things I have ever challenged myself to do. I found that it was actually fairly straightforward - all you need to do is devote 5 minutes of your day to somebody else... let them know they are cared about. I think it is something we should all endeavor to do - the world can be a cold, heartless place, but we are all cared for by somebody and we all know people we care about. Perhaps we should let each other know a little more often that we're not alone. It is likely that I failed this goal as I think there are likely to be days where I didn't really speak to anybody. Regardless, I feel like I succeeded as I kept this goal in my mind every day and still deliberately adhered to it as recently as yesterday.
I will always remember 2012 for... The summer months I spent with Saskia, Teresa & the nutters at the Pack Horse
My proudest moment of 2012 was... being woken by a phone call from work saying that they needed me there ASAP and subsequently working as hard as I ever have to "save the day" and, as a consequence, securing a significant amount of contracted hours.
My highlight of 2012 was... Sitting in my graduation gown having a fabulous meal with my mum, dad and grandma on the day of my 22nd in my favourite city in the whole wide world. Something of a collectors item and a memory I will cherish forever.
I probably should have... thought a little less and acted a little more
I probably shouldn't have... drank so much!
I have learnt... that hard work, dedication and belief in myself DOES get rewarded but there is nothing more important in life than occasionally putting it all to one side to share in experiences with the people you love.
Finally... I have made many new friends in 2012 and shared some amazing experiences with the people around me. Unfortunately many of those around me also suffered the loss of Terry Faye - a man who I feel I owe a lot to. Terry's friendly nature and the way he welcomed me the first time I played poker made me feel comfortable in an environment which has now become like a second home for me. Without him I would perhaps not have made some of the friends that I've made, not made some of the amazing memories and quite simply, not be the same person I am today. Thanks for everything Tezza, I miss you.
I will write my goals for 2013 in another post at another time. I'm going to sit here and reflect for a little while longer first. Here's to 2012
